When I was a kid, what I knew about love I learned by example from my grandparents.  My parents divorced when I was young.  I only had grandma and grandpa’s relationship to see how it was done right, a man and a woman in love to the end.  As I grew older I started to learn about homosexuality.  This was the 80’s and the AIDS epidemic was in full force.  I didn’t know any gay or lesbian couples then.  All I knew was what I saw on the news, in movies or on TV sitcoms.  LIttle did I know then that America, let alone myself, didn’t have a clue.

Now, after 4 decades on God’s green Earth have I finally seen for myself that gay and lesbian people love just like everyone else.  And contrary to popular opinion, it doesn’t have anything to do with sex.  Don’t get me wrong, the human orgasm is something I will forever refuse to give up.  But sex has nothing to do with anything, though it helps, when it comes to how one feels for another.  I won’t dismiss it outright.  But sex is not what makes the glue in seccessful relationships.

There exists the ‘Mind, Body and Soul’ theory. This concept has been written about and debated for as long as I can remember.  This is how I see it.  Let’s take one at a time.  First, starting in the middle, I will go with Body. How a person looks physically, more than not, is what catches people’s attention.  That is what tells us silently in our minds at first “I want to know this person”.  A chemical or hormonal reaction takes place that we as human beings find irresistible.  But over time, those hormone levels can plateau, if not fall off completely.  Being physically attracted to someone can fade.  Second on the list is Mind.  What a person thinks, their opinions on anything from religion and family to politics can influence whether you continue to be attracted to someone. Unfortunately when you find the other person has ideas that you don’t believe in or disagree with, it can be a turn off, very quickly.

Third on the list is Soul.  And I am not speaking of a person’s immortal Soul given by God.  Most see this part of the three as the Heart of a person.  It’s what is in the heart of  a person that matters. How a people carry themselves, how they treat others they are surrounded by, how they feel for and care for others can be attractive and powerful.  In my opinion, this can be the most powerful connection of all between 2 people.  How many times have you heard said,”What is he doing with her”, and vice versa. Physically you may not find them compatible.  But they found a connection at the soul level.

What many don’t seem to understand, which I just don’t get, is that these reactions you have to another are not mutually exclusive to heterosexuals. I see those who beleave only heterosexuals know what love is go through life with blinders on.  It is innate in all human being, instinctual.  People cannot help who they are attracted to.  I don’t care what anyone else says.  That is how it is.  Human beings are attracted to human beings, plain and simple. People who just happen to be attracted to others who happen to be the same gender feel, live and love just like any person who is attracted to others of the opposite gender.

“Mind, Body and Soul” is tricky.  Which of the three is important to you when it comes to Love?  Maybe it is two of the thee, or all of the above.  each person is different in this regard.  But what I know is that without the Soul factor in the equation, you don’t stand a chance, with the opposite gender or otherwise.